IN A RELATIONSHIP..

I still don’t know what to feel. “Happy” is just a plain word to describe my emotions right now. I fell in love with this guy 7 days ago, so again I will ask… IS IT TOO SOON? I don’t know but I always talk to myself every night and explain it like this…

Self, you have given chances to other men out there, but you didn’t feel the same happiness that you are feeling when you gave this guy the SAME chance you gave them. Why would you think that it happened too soon? You have known the man for almost 9 years now. He’s not a total stranger. Fate worked in your ways. You have always been so patient with love, and you never look for it. Instead, you let love find you. Destiny wants you to be happy, so it gave you your today. Enjoy every today, who cares what will happen tomorrow…

I am still scared of being committed to someone. I just don’t know if I can still fulfil the duties of a good, if not the best, girlfriend. I haven’t been in a relationship for years, and suddenly this.. this will happen. No regrets, anyway. I’m happy with my decision, and I guess it’s about time. Funny that I just changed my relationship status on facebook, from single to in a relationship. Yep, that, in itself, confirms everything.

Why would I even complicate my life? I love him, and I believe he feels the same, so what’s the reason of not committing, anyway? Uhh. Ignore me, I’m just convincing myself, yes up until now, that it is okay to commit. No harm done, self. You’ll be fine. You’ve done it with two men, both ran for years, why can’t you make it now?

I’m just so overwhelm with love right now. Would you believe, I’m posting almost everyday, sharing my experiences with this guy, over and over? I cannot believe it either. I’m taking my chances with him. If I get hurt in the long run, at least it will just prove me that I have loved. I just have to learn how to trust men again.. AND I TRUST HIM… Oh good heavens, I’m saying “I love you” and “I love you too” more than ever! This better work!!

The only reason why I’m always posting stuff like this on my Tumblr is because I know that he’s reading it. So, yes, it’s my own way of putting pressure on him! LOL joke. (I only put this part just to say.. Hi babe! I know you’re reading this! Hahaha 😝)

NOW, HOW TO END THIS? I’m in a relationship.💕

 

with love,

BLAIRYRANDOM

WHEN IS THE RIGHT TIME TO FALL IN LOVE?

To begin with, I used to ask myself if I’m really in love, or am I just happy? I have posted on my blogspot account why I am too scared to fall in love.. Well, technically, I am not afraid to fall in love, I have always been in love with the thought of being in love, and with fairytale. I believe that somewhere out there, a knight in a white horse will just grab me from this dark reality and live a happy ever after life with me. What I am really scared of, well not the witch –if you say so, but the PAIN from falling in love and being left alone in the middle of the happy ever after. Makes sense? I know, I know.. People always say that you’re not really  in love if you’re not ready to get hurt. I mean, in reality… LOVE COMES WITH PAIN! They always come in pair. And that’s what I am really scared of… The pain that love may have caused me. I am so weak when it comes to emotional pain.

I have been in love twice in my life. They became my boyfriends. YES, I suffered from extreme pain… That’s why I am too scared of being committed with someone, and being madly in love. When I love, I looooove. The love at its extreme meaning, and finest sense, that is how I love. Well, at least before… I don’t know now. Now, do I make sense here? From justifying why I am afraid of being so in love and of being committed with someone?

But who would have thought.. After three long years of avoiding that love and pain, which I said are always partners, Cupid did his thing and struck me using his bow and arrow—yes, even if it’s not February, yet. After years of waiting, I can really say that I AM IN LOVE! I usually ask myself if what I am feeling is love, and everytime I ask myself, I always get NO as an answer… Not this time! Before I told him that I love him, something happened that really made me realize that THIS, what I am feeling, is LOVE. I thought that this is TOO SOON, but I’d rather put it this way.. WHAT IF THAT TOO SOON IS TOO LATE? The last thing I want to happen is to lose him. So before that TOO SOON became TOO LATE, I told him I love him. That leads me with my title, WHEN IS THE RIGHT TIME TO FALL IN LOVE? My answer is.. THERE IS NO RIGHT TIME. LOVE ALWAYS COMES AS A SURPRISE. The only question that you need to ask to know if you’re in love is… DO YOU FEEL THAT IT’S TOO SOON TO FALL IN LOVE? (ANSWER) If you said YES, then what will you do tomorrow if something happens to the one you love? Regret? Then, that TOO SOON should not be considered. If you won’t regret a thing if something happened to him/her, then you’re not in love. On the other hand, if you answered NO, then we don’t have to argue anymore.😄

I would love to share our story, but we are just starting to create memories, so there are still tons of mem’ries out there that I have yet to collect. Maybe few months from now, I could blog about us. After all, we are not yet official couple.

NOT OFFICIAL? Yes, we are not yet there. Sad, I know, but things are just so complicated on my part. Yes, we have that term of endearment, we say “I love you” and “I love you too” to each other, and we talk everyday, so what’s this? I really don’t know. As much as I want to say that this is US, I’d rather say that this is HIM AND ME. Unfair? I guess it’s somehow unfair on his part, but I don’t know.. this is me.. Just the thought of entrusting my happiness to a person scares me. What if I let him be in-charge with my happiness, and then he decided to leave me? I’ll be stuck and get lost. I don’t want that to happen. OR MAYBE IT’S THE DISTANCE? ‘cause you know, we’re more than 4,000 miles apart. Maybe I’m scared that when he’s here, everything will change, and I’ll end up wishing that he’s in my monitor again. I DON’T KNOW. Now, I know I’m not making any sense here. SORRY.

I know. I know. LOVE IS ALL ABOUT TAKING RISKS, but I am not totally ready to entrust everything to him. I’d like to be in-charge of my emotions. This decision of not committing with him doesn’t mean that I don’t love him that much. I love him so much, that I am too scared to lose him. I want to be sure that what we have will last for a lifetime. I want to live every tomorrow with him. I want to spend the rest of eternity with him. It may sound too soon for these, but he made me realize that in love, there is no too soon, and I don’t want to end up saying that it is too late..

I love him. I am giving him an authority to hurt me, but I am trusting him no to. He’s worth the wait, and I believe, will be worth every tear, and every pain, in the future.

LOVE JUST SURPRISED ME. BELIEVE ME, FRIENDS, IT WILL SURPRISE YOU TOO. MAYBE IT’S LOVE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR RIGHT NOW.. GOOD LUCK!💕

Cupid Just Struck,
blairyrandom

FOODIE: SUGAR AND BLOOMS

Have you ever had those days of craving for a good red velvet cupcake? Have you ever had those rants of being so irritated because you cannot find a good cuppie in the province? Well, you don't have to deal with those bad days anymore!! Batangas now has a place of heavenly cuppies!!

I am not a professional food blogger. I am just a skinny lady with a huge appetite, and my friends can testify that I am reliable when it comes to what can make your tummy happy. Let me share with you my Sugar and Blooms (SAB) experience/s...

Since I have decided to stay in Batangas, I've been craving for cupcakes that I'm used on eating when I was staying in Makati. One day, one of my friends posted a photo of red velvet cupcakes with a caption "Finally arrived in Lipa!" I posted a comment asking where she got 'em, and she replied that it's near La Salle Lipa. I was in cloud 9 when I figured that it's near my school!! The next day, I asked my blockmates to go there and try their cuppies. Since then, we always make it a point to visit SAB everyday, before class.

This post is to say thank you to Sugar and Blooms for making my happy tummy, almost everyday of my life. SAB is heaven for a cuppie lover like me!!

Blue Velvet Cupcakes

I used to love Red Velvet, but when I tasted this.. Oh! FOOD PORN! I loved it!! This is my new fave cuppy!!! BLUE VELVET!

Pasta Overload

 Upper left: The famous lasagna! They have the BEST lasagna!! For Php 80.00, it comes with a glass of iced tea! Yumm. ;  Upper right: I think that is the chicken alfredo pasta (sorry, lame blogger haha) it was ordered by my friend, and it's also good. ; Bottom photo: Baked Ziti with white sauce. They are not serving this yet, but yummyyyy!!! My new fave. They gave us a free taste of their newest offering- A MUST TRY!! I think they will serve this tomorrow, July 22, 2013.

with my law school loves enjoying SAB

 Always a good SAB experience with these people!!

Sugar and Blooms

So guys, please visit Sugar and Blooms and have a happy tummy!!!

visit their page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Sugar-and-Blooms/157120574357093

Sugar and Blooms is located at Mataas na Lupa, Lipa City. (Near De La Salle Lipa)

A cuppy lover,
Steffany Blair <3

TO THE WORLD'S GREATEST FRIENDS

Since giving gifts is not really my thing, and spending is not really my common for me (haha) I thought of sparing a space on my personal blog for my bestest friends who are turning a year older this month, July. One yesterday, 20th, and the other on 29th.

My family knows how thankful I am because God blessed me with these two amaziiing friends. Vic, whom I call my bbf (boy bestfriend) has always been my boyfriend for the past 10 years. Vic has always been my partner with everything, and even though we had fights before, we made sure that we patch things up, and settle it like grown-ups. Spye, on the other hand, has always been the ultimate best friend. Spye is the epitome of the word, BEST FRIEND. She has always been there for Vic and me. She's always there to listen and defend me against my frienemies. There are nothing, but good words to describe these two. They are equally amazing, and I love them dearly.

To Spye and Vic,
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE BOTH OF YOU. I MAY NOT BE THE PERFECT FRIEND, BUT YOU KNOW THAT I'M ALWAYS HERE AND YOU CAN NEVER GET RID OF ME. hahahha :)))) THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING, FROM SMALL THINGS TO HUGE ONES, THANK YOU THANK YOU, ESPECIALLY FOR ACCEPTING ME FOR WHO I AM. I LOVE YOU BOTH!!

TRIO

with love,
Steffany Blair <3

Is this LOVE?

This is one of those random blog posts that I did just because I have nobody to talk to at this hour.

Have you ever experienced being in love with a person, yet you don't want to admit that what you're feeling is love? Well, that is what's happening to me now. I think Cupid just struck me, and love has got me, again.. I don't like to admit that I am in love for I believe that it is too soon to label this as love.. Maybe I'm just too happy and overwhelm with this guy's presence, but.. I really don't know!!!

Does love have to wait for years to confirm that it is indeed LOVE?

Now I leave this post with a question...

WHEN IS TOO SOON? WHAT IF IT'S TOO LATE?

Confused as shizz,
Steffany  Blair

GOD NEVER BLINKS.

I really don’t know if it’s right for me to share this, but I just want to let this out off my chest. I haven’t shared with everyone that I was involved in a scam on late 2012. I trusted my friend, and invested into a mini business of selling mobile phones in cheaper prices, and was able to convince some of my friends and relatives to invest (or yes, to buy) units from me. That mini business, is so far, the most stupid thing I have ever decided to do. I did not think, well obviously. I became so excited with the profit that I forgot that there is no easy money. Well, I always say this as my reason.. I TRUSTED A FRIEND, IT’S NOT MY FAULT, but deep down in me, I know it’s my fault. Why didn’t I think twice? Why was I so selfish? I blame myself, until now, for dragging my close friends and relatives in this bull crap! I still cannot move on from that tragedy.

It’s almost 9 months. Imagine the burden of bringing the same bull crap everyday of your life, for the past 9 months. It became heavier as the anger of the people involved is uncontrollable. That feeling of apologizing every single time they ask for a refund, is just so sad. I wanted to give them their money back, but how? I don’t have an income, for I am a student. I tried looking for a job, but I cannot find one. I feel sorry for my family for carrying this burden with me. Yes, and it hurts so much that I can sense people thinking that what happened is nothing to me. Well, I’ve been juggling with school, and all --with this bull crap in my system. It’s not easy, never was, and never will be. I’ve been searching for solutions, but it’s not that easy, I repeat, never easy.. The hardest part is, people want me to rely on my family. Well, of course I’ve been asking them for help, but they just cannot shoulder a million bucks, for we are not rich –and I repeat--- WE ARE NOT RICH! People always tell me that we’re rich, and blahblahblah. What’s your basis, guys? The way we carry ourselvesf? Haay. Well, think again..

So why did I share this.. It’s because I had a very serious talk with someone regarding the status of our family.  I don’t know, but the bottom line is that.. We have this habit of entrusting our fortune to the wrong people. I just don’t want to give out details, for I’m really not that aware of what happened. You see, as I have observed, the Nazareths are not into jobs, and being employees, they're into investing, business and stuff.. So yea... It’s just so sad seeing my grammy so problematic, and I cannot do anything to help her. Worse, I brought her additional problem. What’s with late 2012-mid year 2013? Haay. Definitely not a good year for the Nazareths.

When I was growing up, I didn’t experience problems like these. It’s so easy being a kid, indeed. Being part of the grown-up world is just so hard. It’s just so sad that we’ve come to this. I was not expecting this, and so as my family. We didn’t expect this to happen.. We’re so not used to this.

So... (fame) and fortune don’t last. I have learned a lot from what I’m (we’re) experiencing right now. I swear, I’m a better person today. Now that I have experienced the reality, I can say that life really has its ups and downs. You may be on top now, you’ll never know what will happen tomorrow.

*siiiiiggghhhh*

I’m praying for a better tomorrow, and for the next days, months and years to come to be the best…

No matter what happened, I’m sure that my family will be strong for each other. I’m just so lucky to have the Nazareths behind me. They are indeed the best family in the world.

Whatever happens, always remember.. GOD NEVER BLINKS!

 

Who knows what tomorrow brings? Hold on.. Be strong..

<3 Steffany Blair

SOMETIMES THE GIRL THAT'S BEEN THERE FOR EVERYONE ELSE NEEDS SOMEONE TO BE THERE FOR HER. 

MY POT OF GOLD.

That "ATTY." is my pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.

In order to get that, I got to put up with the rain.

 

 

I don't know about the other law students, but I'm pretty sure that I'm so exhausted right now, to think that I'm just half way on celebrating anniversary with this. I had thoughts of quitting, especially when I've experienced a lot of bullcraps when I was just starting. The only thing that is making me want to stay is my family. They have invested 6 months for my post-grad studies, and then what? I'll quit and disappoint them? I won't! Yes, I know, this has always been my dream, but.. I don't know. I cannot explain. It's just that... it's so hard to be in this world, or maybe I'm still adjusting? For heaven's sake, self, you're on your 6th month!!

 

Earlier in class, our Dean (who was our professor, too), gave a little homily to the class. He said that we should study hard-er and that we should look at our dream of becoming a lawyer as our pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, that explains the quote I typed up there.. yes, up there! Every time our professors talk about their experiences as lawyers, their hardships, and how they want us to see reciting our lawyer's oath, makes me want to strive harder! I am not very bright, but I know I'm not stupid. I can make it here, I know I can. Our professors are just so inspiring.

 

I feel like I just quit law school when I dropped my Criminal Law 1 class for the reason that I cannot study anymore. I started to ask myself, what the hell did I do? Why did I raise the white flag without even trying? On second thought, this is a safe place for me right now. I always tell my friends to fight for our dreams, and we will be lawyers, too, in no time! We don't have to rush things because law school is not about the span of time you have spent in school, but on how much you have learned. Slowly but surely, as they say, is the best motto in law school.

 

I can sense that my facebook friends are annoyed already with all my rants about school, but please, you cannot blame me, I need to release my thoughts, or I will die! Ever had that feeling of being so exhausted and all you want to do is to shout it all out? Well, that's basically how I feel-- every f-ing day (and night). My rants may sometimes be too much, I know, I'm sorry, but that's just my way of releasing my stress. Uhh. Maybe you'll say.. "in social media?!" Oh well, I would answer you this way.. Yes, in social media. BECAUSE I need an outlet for everything, and I need someone who will understand me, and talk to me to help me out. It may look like I'm seeking attention, but what I'm looking for is comfort.

 

Today, I am thinking on how to be the best law student that I can be. I have to major in time management, and do a lot of juggling. The most important thing to do is.. I have to focus on my goal, my dream, and my journey on getting it done.

 

I will be one of the officers of the law of the land, one day.. SOMEDAY..

 

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined.

 

 

Dream big.. Dreams do come true,

Steffany Blair <3